Buyer Unmasked

To prove you don't need to be fat to be a planet plunderer, trim Russian oil billionaire and football fan Roman Abramovich is alleged to be the tasteless clot who bought both Lucian Freud's Benefits Supervisor Sleeping and Francis Bacon's Triptych, according to The Art Newspaper. (His lady's a doll, by the way, not the elephant I'd assumed.) A total of £60 million spent on tripe in one week! Think of the CO2 emissions those paintings cost the planet.